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So after Duke’s failed stint on a talk show he walks backstage to see this ‘actor’ delivering a tirade of abuse at an unfortunate employee. Listen to all of them & you will get your gamer score but might I suggest you take the time to actually listen to them….it’s a mix of amusing, stupid & pointless messages. The phone messages that are left for Duke throughout the game are directly related to an achievement. None of which are particular fun but do give you ego boosts. So should you get sick of hearing Duke say “I’ve got balls of fail” every time you lose you can also play air-hockey, slot machines, video poker & pool. Pinball is but one of the many mini-games our man Duke can play with but it is the most infuriating as the mechanics are just…broke. No.9 – Mini-games as far as the eye can see. The boobs move like jelly when slapped & look suspiciously fake, it’s very weird.

Walk up to them & you will get an action prompt where Duke will slap all 3 boobs & make a Duke-quip about milk or some other shit.

That’s not weird is it? Well seeing as you can’t slap the boobs of any of the girls in the game the creators say fit to add some alien wall boobs to The Hive level. There are plenty of things you can see or do in Duke Nukem Forever….you just might feel a bit dirty afterwards. So why have I chosen Duke Forever as my latest 10 things…? Simple….I have just recently finished my insane run of the single player game & everything is fresh in my mind. Eventually a product was finally released to an audience that had passed Duke by….it was a let-down by most who played it, me included.

Ahh….my first modern 10 things to try/do & I’ve chosen one of the most controversial & disappointing games to come out in the last couple of years.ĭuke Nukem Forevers lengthy development is well documented….12 years & many different companies involved.

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